I am fortunate. Even through this loss, I have reminded myself of this each day.
I have a husband, family, and a group of close friends who don't always "get" what I am going through, but love me regardless. I have an excellent therapist that specializes in this kind of loss, great medical care to help us through whatever this SIF is throwing at us, and we live without having to worry about our next meal, or whether or not we can pay the heating bill. These are just a few of the things I try to remind myself of in my darkest hours.
There are many mothers in this world who lose their children everyday without the comfort of a family, a roof over their head, a safe society to live in, access to medical care etc. It could be worse. There are so many in this world, even those that have never lost a child, that have it worse. Poverty, war, famine, the list goes on an on.
There is no shortage of grief in this world, and no shortage of people that could use our help, in some capacity or another.
When we were marking Peyton's first birthday, I really wanted to find something positive to do in her name. I have all these grand plans in mind about a Peyton Foundation I hope to one day set up to support NICU families. Even then, during the nightmare of worry that was Peyton's life, I realized how lucky were were to be together, in a hospital that specialized in children, and on the receiving end of many random acts of kindness. I have often thought how much harder it would have been to be there as a single parent, or to find ourselves instead in some huge city hospital where we could have gotten lost in the shuffle. I felt frustrated as Peyton's birthday approached to not yet be in a place where I could carry something like this out, but I do believe that in time, my energy will return, my emotions will be lifted, and this idea will get off the ground.
So, that left me in a bit of a pickle as Peyton's birthday approached. I was a mess. I wanted to do some good to mark her day, but also knew it needed to be something that wouldn't be affected by whether or not I was having a good or a bad day.
I sent checks out to our usual charities, but still felt like something was missing. I wanted something new. Something unique for her special day. I was reading around on the internet, trying to get ideas when I came across (Carleigh's Momma) Holly's family blog and the story of Shalini, a little girl from India that Carly sponsors through Compassion International. I knew once I saw the picture (and checked out Compassion International on Charity Navigator) that this was what I wanted to do as Peyton's Birthday gift. So today, for show and tell, I am sharing with you, our little sponsor child Lizeth. She is from Bolivia, 5 years old, and just adorable. Sponsorship covers food, education, bible studies, medical and dental expenses, job training for her parents.... and... birthday parties! How fun is that? I don't know why I loved that my sponsorship would get her a birthday party, but it brought a smile to my face and welcoming this little child into our heart at a point when we were so missing Peyton, well it just felt right. I searched many children's profiles, but I knew once I saw Lizeth, that she was the one...Anyone that matches a fancy party dress with boots and a turtle neck is my kinda kid!
We just received our first picture of her, sorry the picture quality here is so bad, I don't have a scanner so I took a picture of her picture. Last week we responded with our own picture and a letter back to her: How do you like school? What do you do for fun? Etc. Etc. I am really looking forward to learning all about her and her family.
To see what others are showing and telling, click Here.
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Please also send Lisette some love today. Her little baby girl, Lauren Samantha, was born into her arms this Monday, and into Heaven shortly after.
That is so wonderful. I may have to do that myself.
ReplyDeleteThat is a wonderful way to honor Peyton. what a blessing to this little girl. xoxo
ReplyDeletewhat a wonderful way to honor peyton!! (and Carleigh) I too may have to look into this..thank you for sharing!
ReplyDeleteYour sponsored child is beautiful and I am sure you have changed her life forever. I am right there with you... the turtleneck, skirt and boots are hard to pass up, she is too cute.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your comment on my blog but most of all thanks for your blog. You sharing your heart is truly inspiring to me. I can only imagine how hard it has been for you and your family. Please know you are in my prayers and that I do cherish your words, and their honesty.
She is beautiful. That is a wonderful thing you are doing for her.
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful way to recognize Peyton's birthday.
ReplyDeleteIt's so wonderful to share your heart with a child who is in need of care and love. I'm sure Payton is proud of her sweet wonderful mommy! I certainly am...It was a wonderful choice as a gift to honor your little one. (HUG)
ReplyDeleteI am just so happy that you did this. I love knowing that I am helping Shalini have a better life and that it was Carleigh that brough me to this. I just love Lizeth's attier. :) She has such a cheery face! I hope you enjoy getting to know her. We got our first letter from her not too long ago and it was so exciting.
ReplyDeleteOh Peyton would be so PROUD of her mama. What a kind and beautiful thing to do, not only to honour Peyton's memory but to help this lovely underprivledged child. This made me smile so much and is such a nice reminder to me that there is so much good in our world despite what we have been through. Sending you hugs
ReplyDeleteAn excellent way to honor Peyton's birthday. You're incredibly strong to be able to come out of yourself enough to care for others in this way. Most people who do not have your burdens wouldn't put themselves out for a little girl in Bolivia.
ReplyDeleteThat is such a beautiful thing to do in Peyton's name =)
ReplyDeleteTHank you for sharing this, I love that you get to help her get her birthday party!!
Love to see a smile on your face. (My dad is from Bolivia, and I like Lizeth's outfit, too!)
ReplyDeleteWhat a heartwarming story. That's what this thing we call life is all about-- rising, falling, experiencing, pushing our competitive and selfish tendencies aside, digging through all the fluff, listening, feeling and finding that, while many situations and people suck, there is still a HUGE world out there that needs and appreciates our compassion and kindness.
You are just wonderful. And I only hope that many others learn and wake up to the art of understanding. We'd all be so much better off...
That is so loving. What a gift in Peyton's memory. (((Hugs)))
ReplyDeletewhat a wonderful thing.
ReplyDeleteI had tears streaming down my face reading this. That is such a beautiful and amazing thing to to for her birthday.
ReplyDeletexxx
What a beatiful gift in memory of your daughter! I might do this in memory of my daughter for her first birthday next May.
ReplyDeleteWhat a blessing Peyton is to Lizbeth. You are a wonderful mother and I am humbled by your love for her and how you honor her.
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful little girl. What an incredibly, selfless thing for you to do. I think its an amazing way to honour Peyton, i'm sure she is SO proud of you. *hugs*
ReplyDeleteShe's beautiful. Giving is the best thing you can do, and what a wonderful thing to do for Peyton and for your family.
ReplyDeleteMy friend Meghan just finished her chemo and radiation treatments for Rectal Cancer in June - she's 34. They were told they could not have children - they just received their first foster baby - 7 months old - bumps, bruises, stitches and ready for their love. Where there is love & faith there is hope. Thank you for turning toward the love in your loss to make a better day. With Love, Jennifer
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