I'm So Sorry

I'm so sorry that you were so young
and knew not what to do.
I'm so sorry that the guilt of this
now daily batters you.

I'm so sorry that your thoughts on life
had to gain so much depth.
I'm so sorry that your innocence
left as she drew that last breath.

I'm so sorry that this tragedy
is the only motherhood you've known.
I'm so sorry you never heard her say Momma
or saw her healthy, strong and grown.

I'm so sorry the hurt is always there
walking with you every day.
I'm so sorry that as a new mother
you've never known any other way.

I'm so sorry that your mind replays
all that she went through.
I'm so sorry that you can't accept
it's what you had to do.

I'm so sorry that it happened
and all the pain you're in.
I'm so sorry that God dealt you a hand
impossible to win.

I'm so sorry for the loss of her
and never knowing how or why.
I'm so sorry that you had to watch
your precious daughter die.

I'm so sorry that you've lost yourself
and what you drempt would be.
But most of all I'm so sorry
this poem is about me.

~Kristin Binder