Monday, December 28, 2009

Devastated...

There are no other words. Just devastated.
Both tubes are shot. Both f*cking tubes! The best they could offer me for answers was that "there is no justice in this world," and that it's "most likely from an infection after the c-section." The c-section I had to bring a child condemned to death into this world. I carried a child with cancer and no one caught that. I have seen an OB/GYN monthly since, and no one caught this infection.
Angry.
Hopeless.
Devastated.

53 comments:

  1. Oh no! I am so sorry to hear this! What can they do to fix it??? xx

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  2. You poor girl, I am so sorry. ((HUGS)) I understand your anger, hopelessness and devastation. What can I do to help you, what is the next step for hope? How can I pray?

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  3. Oh...... I am beyond words sorry. So, so sorry.

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  4. Oh hon, that just isn't fucking fair. Damn it. This really pisses me off at the universe. {{{Hugs}}}

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  5. Oh sweetie.
    I am so so so sorry.
    Oh shit this is so unfair. So bloody unfair.

    xxx

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  6. I'm devastated for you. This world is so tragically unfair. I know words are of little comfort, but I'm thinking about you. xoxo

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  7. No justice in this world..how incredibly enlightening..thank you captain obvious.. ugh.. I am so sorry there are no words to offer comfort right now.. its so hard when all you want is a healthy baby. one to keep..it does not seem like that is such a big thing to ask for,right? I wish there was something I could do to ease the pain..big hugs Kristin..

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  8. Honey get a 2nd opinion at a teaching hospital.

    Don't settle for the BS they are spewing.

    That is ONE RE's opinion.

    Miracles happen and you KNOW it.

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  9. Oh Kristin, I am so sorry...How devastating indeed. It sounds like you will have to go the IVF route, something we too are considering since I had my tubes tied. I also got a devastating infection after my c-section, a bad e.coli infection that took six weeks of antibiotics to clear up. I wonder if my tubes would have been damaged also had I not already tied them. I'm so sorry sweet lady, I know this is a huge blow. I also know this is something you will find a way to overcome, you are not meant to be without a child. Sending you my love...

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  10. Oh no. I'm so, so very sorry. Holding you very close.

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  11. Delurking to say I'm so very sorry. There are no words, really...but I couldn't read this one and not say something. I'm here, I'm thinking of you, and I'm so sorry.

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  12. Oh sweetie...I wish I knew what to say, when I know there are no words that can really help you.

    You're in my thoughts and prayers.

    I'm so very sorry.

    Hugs. Lots and lots of hugs.

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  13. I know that hugs from a stranger will probably not make you feel better but I just wanted to offer some to let you know that people are out here reading about you and caring for you. I am so sorry that you have to face another setback. Life really can be awful sometimes. *HUGS*

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  14. oh honey. I am so sorry. I dont even know what to say. My heart cries with you.

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  15. I have been following your blog for some time now.. I am so sorry that you didn't receieve good news today. This must be heart breaking for you and your Husband. I will continue to keep you in my prayers. I hope the New year brings some hope and peace.
    Hugs,
    Sarah

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  16. Oh no. Oh Kristin. Devastated on your behalf. Too, too unfair. I'm so terribly sorry.

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  17. Oh gosh honey I'm so sorry. I'm just so so sorry

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  18. I'm just devastated for you. So unfair. So wrong. I'm so so sorry.

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  19. I don't think there is a word to describe news like this. Devastating doesn't seem to go nearly far enough. It is an answer, so perhaps the way forward can be a little more clear, although terribly invasive and expensive - as if you haven't been through enough already!

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  20. WTF??? Is there anything they can do?

    Hugs to you, friend.

    MB

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  21. I am so terribly sorry. Devastated for you.

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  22. Ugh I cant imagine your frustration! Doctors drive me mad !
    I am so sorry

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  23. I'm so sorry, love. I truly am. Please know that I'm sending you SO much love and holding you so close to my heart right now.
    *HUGS*

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  24. I echo everyone's sadness at this news. I am so sorry. And I'm sending lots of love to you xxxx

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  25. Oh no, no, no. I am so very, very sorry. Thinking of you and your husband Kristin.

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  26. Horrible. I am angry for you. I am crying for you. I am so sorry.

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  27. Kristen, I am so sorry that you didn't hear good news today. There are no words. I am so sorry and you are in my prayers.

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  28. Just wanted to say how terribly sorry I am . . . . Probably doesn't make you feel better. I am thinking of you.

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  29. Oh my gosh. Oh, no. Oh, this is so unfair (duh, I know you know that). Oh, honey, I am so sorry for this horrible news. I wish I knew what to do or say. I wish I had some inspiration for you.
    I am holding you close. Lots of hugs.
    xxoo

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  30. I am just so devastated for you. I am so sorry for this awful news. I wish I could make everything better.

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  31. Fuck. I am so sorry. This is so unfair and meaningless.

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  32. I'm so sorry. I'm still praying hard for you and haven't given up.

    ((((hugs and prayers)))

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  33. Devastated (and pissed)right along with you. Thinking of you and praying for you!

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  34. Krissy, I am so sorry to hear this news. But I have so much faith in your ability to find a way out of anything. I know that you'll have everything you truly want in your life. It's just time for Plan B. Don't lose sight of your goal...

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  35. I'm so sorry, Kristin. I've been praying so hard for you today and just checked in now that we're home to see how your appointment went. I'm just at a loss at what to say to give you comfort other than that I'm sending you love and storming heaven still. xo

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  36. Hi Kristin

    I've just had my adhesions discovered after 2 years of TTC. They might be able to help you with a laparoscopy to see where the damage is and how bad it is. They sometimes try to fix it by removing some of the scar tissue, but the problem is that it often causes more scar tissue. Blocked tubes are unbelievably common. And another weird thing is that they sporadically sometimes clear up. The good news is that the success rates for IVF with blocked tubes are really high. And like you saw on my blog, there are also alternative therapies. I'm still in two minds about it myself! I'm so sorry to read your story, it is devastating. I hope you get some really good news soon.

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  37. Oh honey, I'm so so sorry, life is so shit sometimes,and you deserve so much more. Holding you close and holding on to hope for you. x

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  38. Kristin...

    First...I am really sorry you've gotten more shitty news to pile on top of the heap you've already had shoveled upon you!

    Second...bad tubes are not not not the end of your story. You have GOOD eggs! You know you do. They can do amazing things with good eggs, good sperm and a petri dish. Your uterus is NOT shot. You are NOT shot. You will make it...their is a path. There is an open door. And we are all here to hold your hands...because you are a wonderful mother, and you deserve to smile again.

    So much love...

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  39. I am just so sorry. XO. So unfair.

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  40. My heart has just sunk read this. I can't believe it....I'm so sorry.

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  41. Abiding with you while you are angry and devastated.

    We are all supporting and loving you. XOXO

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  42. Sending warmth and support to you. I am so genuinely sorry... {{XXX}}

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  43. I am so sorry. This is a horrible news. So much to take and to process. And to wrap your mind around. I am sorry.

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  44. OMG.... haven't been here in a few days just to find out about your terrible news on LFCA. I hope a second opinion from another (trusted) doctor will give you more clarity.

    Sending hugs and all the good vibes I have! xoxo

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  45. I'm with some of the commenters above: Get a 2nd opinion. Dr. L's blog (http://infertilityblog.blogspot.com/) has a few posts about misread, misdiagnosed, and generally botched HSGs.

    Though it's completely understandable if this is the last thing you feel up to. Getting news like this is incredibly awful, after all you've had to face. Sending huge hugs and hope your way.

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  46. That absolutely sucks. I'm so sorry this is happening. I hope you will get a second opinion.

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  47. ((((((Hugs and Prayers)))))

    Warmly,
    Georgiann

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  48. this made me want to cry , im so sorry for you big hugs
    nikki xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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