Wednesday, November 24, 2010

On Blessings and Gratitude This Thanksgiving

I am blessed to share my life and love with an amazing husband...

who is also my best friend...

and an incredible father.

 I am blessed to know what no one else in this world knows - 
what it is to be this little girl's mother.

I know how it felt to be looked at with those sparkly blue eyes...

and the warmth that came in holding 
her close and being the recipient of her unguarded love.

As well as the great gift that comes with feeling her all around me, 
even though she has gone.

I am blessed to have the the loyalty and love
of a very special pup who came along at just the right time,
and has done wonders to bring healing into my heart.

This Thanksgiving I feel especially blessed and grateful
that what we were once told was impossible has come to be,
and a renewed sense of hope and promise has re-entered our lives.

Baby A - Boy
Baby B - girl

And then there is the unyielding support of my friends, family, and this community who have celebrated with us in triumph, and stood arm and arm with us in our sorrow. There are no words for what this has meant to me.

When you live on this side of the loss and infertility universe, and trudge through your days in that old pair of shoes that we never imagined ourselves wearing, it is so easy to focus only on what is missing. 

No one is more guilty of this than me. 

But there are blessings.

Even in the moments along this journey where the road seems too hard, and the future feels full of impossibilities, there are always blessings to be felt and found. If last Thanksgiving I could have seen what this Thanksgiving would hold, I never would have been able to believe it. Joy felt impossible.

But this year, despite the unending grief and sense of loss that I will always feel for Peyton, and despite the high risk nature of my pregnancy with the Snowflakes, and the bedrest, and the health issues, I can't help but to feel truly blessed.

And that is my wish for each and every one of you - a day where your heart feels full of blessings and peace. And if tomorrow that still feels impossible - hold out hope. There is no telling what seemingly impossible things the days between this Thanksgiving and the next will bring. 

Happy Thanksgiving!


  1. Thanks for reminding to appreciate the little things. It is nice to hear you feeling upbeat.

  2. Beautiful. I am so sorry for your loss, and so happy for you and the snowflakes. Prayers go out to you all.

  3. Wishing you the Happiest of Thanksgivings! May the year ahead be full of grace and peace for you and yours!

  4. And I'm thankful to know you... even if by blog.

  5. Beautiful post full of true thankfulness. Happy, happy Thanksgiving to you!

  6. Wishing you and your honey a Happy Thanksgiving, may you be filled with peace.
    I love your pictures, so beautiful. Thank you for sharing them. Also THANK YOU so much for your friendship. I am blessed!

  7. Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.

  8. Wow! I feel so uplifted from your post today.
    Your grief has gripped you but you still see what you can be grateful for. Your strength is contagious, your story a miracle. You give BLM's a reason for hope and a shout for joy. Thank you. Your absolutely beautiful with your twins and little Peyton. I am so happy for you and encouraged with your endurance. Can't wait for your next update.

  9. Thank you for this beautiful post...Happy Thanksgiving!

  10. this is so very lovely.
    happy thanksgiving to you.

  11. Happy Thanksgiving Kristin, thinking of you!

  12. That was beautiful. I hope I can remember it tomorrow when those little moments of sadness hit me. Happy Thanksgiving!

  13. What a lovely, heartfelt post. Happy Thanksgiving to all my friends on the other side of the world.

  14. Beautiful as always, Kristin!


  15. I love, love seeing more pictures of Peyton. What a beautiful girl. I can't wait to see your twins-I know they will be just as gorgeous.
    You deserve every wonderful thing that you have!

  16. Optimism seems foreign to me. I know it will return, but my loss is just too recent for that now. Hearing your words does give me hope. I needed the reminder that there will keep being tomorrow's and holiday's and happy things for me to look forward to. Thank you.

  17. You look wonderful!

    And it always amazes me to see Peyton's beauty. She seemed so thoughtful and full of grace.

    Have a happy Thanksgiving!

  18. This was a great post Kristen. I too am guilty of focusing on what I no longer have. But, I am very grateful for that time with him. I love your of your precious Peyton. She truly is a beauty.

  19. beautiful... happy thanksgiving!!!

  20. Happy Thanksgiving Kristin! You look absolutely gorgeous in that last picture.

  21. Happy Thanksgiving!
    WOW a boy AND a girl how totally exciting!

    Praying all continues to go well!


  22. Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family!!

  23. Beautiful post...there are blessings and gifts all around...if we keep looking.

    Love to you...hope you had a blessed Thanksgiving.

  24. It takes a special grace to be able to find the joy and blessings around the grief. I hope one day to come as far as you have.

  25. A lovely post. I hope that you had a blessed Thanksgiving. I just wanted to say I am sorry for the loss of your sweet Peyton, she is absolutely beautiful. Thinking of you and your snowflakes!

  26. So with you on so much...especially how easy it is to focus on what's missing even in the middle of being overwhelmed with what we have. I think that just shows how much what's missing really and truly means to us.

    Peyton was such a beautiful, beautiful little girl. What an honor and privilege to be her mother.


  27. What a beautiful story of loss and continued love! You are courageous to share. And you are brave to move ahead. I too lost my first baby long ago - a son whose birthday is December 8th. And it was difficult to move on, but now I have a daughter and another son. Time does not erase the memory, but opens new doors. Wishing you the best!

  28. all the pictures are just beautiful